Heaven's Baby Boy

Life

It's unpredictable and many times unfair when you think about it.

A phrase we tell kids many times when they are not happy or the situation was not fair.



Sometimes we don't know when we are going to have to use the resources we prepared for. Sometimes we have lots of notice for when we will be required to use it...and then it may be sprung on you on a normal everyday kind of day.

For me...that was a Thursday I will never forget.

I had just recently put Nolan down for a nap after giving him a haircut and a special mid day bath time. Eliza was away at school, but expected to return soon on the bus. Alden was rather clingy due to teething, so I kinda ran with it and wanted to enjoy some non kid tv time. A real luxury.

Then I found my front door opening. It couldn't have been Matt, as he had already come home briefly on his lunch break and there were no other therapists scheduled to come in the afternoon for Eliza.

It was my neighbor.

She had a baby in her arms, one who I knew and had held at just hours old in the hospital. You could see a frightful look in her eyes. At first I thought she needed some help with some first aid supplies for a bloody nose. But as she came closer, and proceeded to hand him in my arms....there was much more going on and he was limp.

For a split second, it dawned on me, "Oh my God, I am actually going to have to use my cpr training for real!"

I immediately took him to the floor and did a rescue puff. Then as my training was flooding back to me, I remembered to try to locate a pulse. No pulse. As I gave rescue breathing, I could hear fluid in the lungs and there was a bloody discharge coming from his nose.

Well now...they certainly didn't go through this in class!?

 So as I continued rounds of CPR, my neighbor was continuing her call with 911 and ensuring the emergency help came to the right house. I continued with this until a paramedic took over and I assisted with the oxygen until the ambulance arrived and they didn't wait for them to come in the door. He was scooped up and rushed inside it.

It wasn't until I was at the police station, giving a deposition that I was able to get an update on the baby and his passing. A flood of 'what ifs' came gushing. Did I do the CPR right? Was my rescue breathing strong enough or too strong?

One would hope for a positive outcome to result in having this sort of training for his life to be saved. But despite how the day ended...God was in the details.

He helped me remain calm

He helped bring my training back to memory

He had a doctors appointment for Alden canceled before hand that morning. If this hadn't happened, I wouldn't of been home when she tried my door.

He helped Matt be able to get off work to help watch the kids and give a place for our neighbors to crash at our house for the afternoon and evening while the police did their investigation.We had food to eat and warmth from the outside.

No one but God could see this coming. Life can be too short and there are no guarantees about the one you are given. But I do know where this little baby boy is sitting, and it gives me hope.

So please, hug your children tight. Love them all the more despite the times they are driving you nuts and crying over anything and everything. Because they are alive and well to do those things. There is so much brokenness going on, but I have faith in The Almighty who will use this and good fruit will be produced. Maybe not right now, but with time....anything is possible with God.